Have a question? Send it to [email protected]! But I recently found out that my ex is dating someone new, and for some reason, it bothers me. Am I psychologically cheating on my current girlfriend?
I hear you that your old relationship is in the past. And yet, humans are complex. Recent findings in neuroscience indicate that each person is uniquely shaped and influenced by their entire history of interactions. In other words, we will always hold our own stories within us. This history is integrated through our complex brain systems.
Here is a little experiment for you. Soften your face and body into deeper relaxation for a moment. Close your eyes, focus your attention inside your body β in your heart β and let your mind float back in time.
Now, enter the memory scene of your first kiss β and on some level, you will re-experience it. If you had a special bond with the person, or have other fond memories, you may even be aware of positive emotional sensations.
Also, if it was not a positive experience, your responses may bring up negative feelings. Your first kiss was likely a moment of intense sensation.
