I feel like I've read just about everything that can be read on the topic, but I'm still left a bit bewildered on the lube question, where there's lots of "there's no such thing as too much lube," but not a lot of clear direction on where it's actually supposed to GO. I realize that one couple's MMV widely in this area, and that over time we'll learn what's best for us, we should just experiment and enjoy, yada yada What's the approach that has worked best for you?
If we did only c or d just prior to an encounter, might that be enough for "spontaneous" anal sex without further lubing up? Do any folks recommend those syringe-like applicators shooters? If you had to pick one, what's the 1 most important place that the lube is deployed? You're about to help put some really big smiles on two adorable people's faces.
In my limited to 1 partner, only occasional, she's generally the instigator, though we have also played on me with toys experience, there's no such thing as "spontaneous" anal sex, it's one of those things that progresses slowly and takes a while. It's not "squirt some lube and hop on", it's "work lube around the anus, slide my penis up and down the crack to get lube on it, tease around the entrance, slide a little more to get more lube goin' on", and so forth.
And it's not just a matter of getting lube in all of those places, but in relaxing all of the associated areas. From my own experience playing on me with toys and this is may be a good exercise for you to understand some of the mechanics , even with things fully lubed up my body can clamp down and reject something, or it can accept it, and sometimes the differences between those states are subtle and I'm not consciously aware of it.
So: a , b , and probably a little d , although you can in theory also get it there with a penis. My experience with anal sex is that it's kinda like sex with a condom If both partners are focused on exploring all the sensations and communicating them to each other then it works, otherwise it's work.
